Ben Franklin Had More Than 200 Synonyms For ‘Drunk’

The most badass Founding Father loved his booze and he loved his words. He put the two together when he compiled The Drinker’s Dictionary, containing more than 200 ways to say someone is drunk. Enrich your vocabulary!

Ben Franklin is the best Founding Father. He ate well, he drank excessively, he loved to fuck and he was a pop hero when he lived in Paris - so much so that he made coonskin caps popular among the French. When the discussion was happening about what the United States’ national bird should be he advocated the turkey. He invented a ton of shit, he was funny as hell, and when his illegitimate son William, last Loyalist governor of New Jersey, wouldn’t come around during the Revolutionary War Ben more or less had the kid exiled. A true badass, who once said ‘Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.’

In 1737 he used his considerable intellect to come up with a list of over 200 synonyms for being drunk, which he published in the Pennsylvania Gazette (I really feel like Ben was the first blogger). Mental Floss has the entire alphabetized list; here are some highlights.

He’s casting up his Accounts,
He’s Afflicted,
He’s Biggy,
Piss’d in the Brook,
Drunk as a Wheel-Barrow,
Has Stole a Manchet out of the Brewer’s Basket,
His Head is full of Bees,
Half Way to Concord,
Has taken a Chirriping-Glass,
Got Corns in his Head,
He’s been too free with the Creature,
Sir Richard has taken off his Considering Cap,
He’s Chap-fallen,
Kill’d his Dog,
Wet both Eyes,
Got the Pole Evil,
Made an Example,
He’s Eat a Toad & half for Breakfast.
Been to France,
Froze his Mouth,
Has Taken Hippocrates grand Elixir,
Seen the French King,
He makes Indentures with his Leggs,
Well to Live,
Got Kib’d Heels,
Seen a Flock of Moons,
Smelt of an Onion,
He’s been among the Philippians,
He’s contending with Pharaoh,
He’s burnt his Shoulder,
He’s got his Top Gallant Sails out,
He makes Virginia Fence,
Got the Indian Vapours.