Someone is wrong on the internet, and it’s about PLANET OF THE APES, so Devin can’t just let it be.

Vulture ran a story about how Rise of the Planet of the Apes has spawned a catchphrase. It’s real bullshit filler nonsense, but what’s worse is that it’s WRONG bullshit filler nonsense, and I cannot let this stand.

Spoilers for Rise of the Planet of the Apes follow.

Vulture says that the catchphrase is “Caesar is home,” which is what Caesar says to James Franco’s Will Rodman at the very end of the movie, indicating that he will remain with his uprisen ape cohorts in the woods. But come on, that’s not a catchphrase. It’s a really good moment, and it’s a nice scene, but I don’t know when the hell I would ever use that in real life.

There IS a catchphrase that arose from the film, though, and it’s the movie’s best line. It’s not even spoken - Maurice the orangutan signs it to Caesar. It is simple and evocative and hilarious:

Why cookie Rocket?

It’s the key to Caesar’s leadership strategy, where he brings the aggressive alpha male Rocket over to his side, and the answer to it is basically ‘Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer,’ one of the other all-time great movie lines. Plus it’s just delightfully phrased. It’s kind of the ‘What’s taters, precious?’ of this movie.

So sorry, Vulture, but you guys got it wrong. I’ll be pre-ordering my Why Cookie Rocket? shirt while you guys keep mumbling Caesar Is Home to each other.

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