Hey JCVD fans! That's all of you, right? Well, those of you who live in Austin or Kansas City have some crazy ass-kicking business headed your way. I am super enthusiastic about this event, but my exhilaration pales in comparison to that of Alamo programmer Greg MacLennan's, so I'll let him do the talking:
Alamo Drafthouse's ZZANG!!! series has teamed up with the BANGARANG! series to pay the ultimate tribute to all things awesome from the '80s and '90s. Nothing seems better suited for our first ever ZZANGARANG!!! like a send-up to one of the greatest and most charismatic roundhousers to ever grace the silver screen. With that we give you VAN DAMMAGE, a three movie marathon of our favorite VAN DAMME movies leading straight into a FREE ADVANCED SCREENING OF THE EXPENDABLES 2. If that doesn't get your blood pumping and push your testosterone levels to brick-smashing levels, nothing will. This cinematic monument to the only and only JCVD will be hitting the South Lamar Theater in Ausin on August 15th and the Mainstreet Theater in Kansas City on August 16th.
What movies can you hope to see? We can't tell you. IF we were to release the line-up of excitement we have planned for you, you'd instantly find yourself with tufts of hair all over your body and your goosebumps would ripple into the manliest muscles you've ever seen. But, rest assured we will have menu specials, surprises galore, and some of the Muscliest from Brusseliest action films of VAN DAMME'S career gracing The Alamo Drafthouse's silver screen. Think you have what it takes to survive FOUR movies of nonstop white-knuckled mayhem? This event is not for the weak at heart. Pulses will pound, bones will be shattered, and roundhouses will be delivered in stylish slow-motion to ensure maximum VAN DAMMAGE! Tickets are on sale now! (Greg MacLennan)