Badass Bet: If Christopher Nolan Directs BOND 24, I’ll Eat My Bond Memorabilia

Nolan for 007, eh? Care to make it interesting?

Lordy, look at all this hit bait! I'm gonna be honest: I didn't even read any of these articles crowing about Christopher Nolan "taking meetings" or "in discussions" or "in discussions to take a meeting" to direct Bond 24. I was away for work last week and suddenly got a flurry of emails and DMs asking me to weigh in on whether the Great Visionary Savior Of Geekdom will be following in the shoes of such auteurs as Roger Spottiswoode and Michael Apted to direct the next James Bond mission, as if he didn't get enough of it out of his system between his Dark Knight trilogy and Inception.

Eon has spent the last couple films hiring upper-tier directors for Daniel Craig's run as Bond, and so linear-thinking fanboys might be forgiven for thinking the producers would aim even higher for the next one. And maybe they are! But lots of great writers and Twitterers and bloggers have already argued why it probably won't happen with Nolan. So since I'm late to the party and the debate's already been had, here's our spin at BAD: If Christopher Nolan directs Bond 24, I will eat a piece of my Bond memorabilia on the first day of principal photography.

That's right: if the write-your-own-ticket-est director in the industry chooses to direct the next 007 outing, I will prepare a piece of my collection (a modest pile of useless and non-potable stuff like poker chips, books, posters and other trinkets, obtained over the years through fellow fans, well-meaning friends and drunk Ebaying), eat it, and post the ingestion here. I'm not trying to posit myself as the Werner Herzog of BAD, but I don't see any other writers putting their inedible nerd collections where their mouths are. (Nor do I want to, for the record.) Below is just a sampling of the menu; I'm not gonna lie, I hope it's not the car.