Are you interested in watching people in very well-designed medieval outfits run away from and/or get hit by CGI monsters? Do you feel like we have a dearth of movies about secret organizations that have been secretly protecting humanity from secret threats since the secret beginning of time? Do you want to see Jeff Bridges deliver dialogue about trolls in a weird accent? Then boy does Legendary have a movie for you: Seventh Son.
Based on the acclaimed series (I don’t know, I’m just telling you what the footage told me), Seventh Son has Jeff Bridges as a weathered witch hunter who teams up with Ben Barnes to teach him how to fight evil. The footage shown at Comic-Con today showcased a ton of CGI monsters, many that were pretty cool looking - a troll that burst out of the ground, a multiple-armed swordsman, a dragon, a bear (it’s a big bear) - and a ton of frantic action with Bridges rolling on the ground and jumping off a cliff, doing that Butch and Sundance leap.
The story is what you’d expect - the new kid falls in love with a witch that he has to kill, and Bridges has a past with another witch. It’s all very familiar.
I’m glad to see the monsters, and I’m happy to see Bridges keep being weird. But everything else is so generic, so boring dark fantasy, that I couldn’t get into it. Which is a weird complaint because ten year old me would have killed to have movies like this on the big screen. I got what I wanted, but it turns out it wasn’t what I wanted after all.