Dick Poop Or, The Expected Ignorance Of Oscar Nominations

Even if you expected the Oscar noms to be bad, you couldn't have expected them to be this bad. 

Cheryl Boone Isaacs made an amusing boner during this morning's live Academy Awards nominations - she called Mr. Turner cinematographer Dick Pope "Dick Poop." And in doing so she gave a theme to the nominations themselves, which leaned so heavily on white guys that you could get snowblindness from looking at a picture of the nominees. 

While there were many, many deserving nominees this year (the full list is at the bottom of this article), the big story has to be the snubs. Who woke up this morning expecting The Lego Movie to be left out of the fray, replaced with Big Hero 6? Many were stunned that Life Itself missed a nom for Best Documentary (the infinitely better movie-related doc, Jodorowsky's Dune, was legitimately snubbed. Life Itself is run of the mill). But most shocking is the fact that Selma got a Best Picture nomination seemingly on the strength of Common and John Legend's song, since it wasn't nominated for screenplay, director, cinematography or any acting awards. That's right - it got Picture and Song. 

Meanwhile The Imitation Game, as insidious a movie as we've seen, stomped through it all, including a baffling nomination for Morten Tyldum, who directed the film right into the boldness of oatmeal. Of course it's a Weinstein movie, so it didn't get where it got on its merits, but rather because of Harvey's willingness to spend and to play dirty in the campaign. It's sickening. 

It's Selma that's making my head spin. Ava DuVernay was, frankly, robbed of a Best Director nomination - a nomination that would have made history. She would have been the first black woman nominated for the award, the fourth black person and the fifth woman. And get this - she deserved it! The Bloody Sunday sequence alone makes the case for her inclusion, although I'd say the rest of the film is very well directed. Also left out from Selma is Bradford Young, who shot two of the best looking movies this year (A Most Violent Year, totally shut out, was the other). How does he not make the cut? How does David Oyelowo not get nominated for an incredible turn as Martin Luther King? And when you think about Selma being left out of the Best Screenplay race, think about this - the movie couldn't use any of Dr. King's actual speeches due to rights issues (Dreamworks owns the speeches, believe it or not). All of the speeches in that movie were written for the movie

I could rant all day just about Selma (and by the way, being left out of the bulk of the awards can actually hurt a movie like Selma, which needs the prestige to keep it going at the box office. While it's a bummer that The Lego Movie won't be recognized, that film has made a ton of cash and everyone involved is set), but others got painfully snubbed this morning. Jake Gyllenhaal somehow didn't make the cut for Nightcrawler but Bradley Cooper is now one of our greatest ever actors, being nominated every year for the last three years. I'm not a huge fan of Foxcatcher, but somehow Bennett Miller is one of the best directors of the year... without having directed one of the year's best films. In many ways Foxcatcher is the anti-Selma, racking up other noms but not cracking the Best Picture race. 

Few note that Tilda Swinton was brutally robbed this year, with Only Lovers Left AliveSnowpiercer and Grand Budapest Hotel showing her breathtaking range and chameleonic abilities. Surely she could have ridden the (happy) Grand Budapest train to a Supporting Actress nod?  

How does this kind of madness happen? I'm truly at a loss for how The Lego Movie got boned. I think that Selma was the victim of a lot of things - racism, sure, in the form of overcorrection for last year's awards - but also the victim of Paramount fucking up the campaign. And then there's good old Harvey Weinstein, the human spoiler, elevating a mediocre movie to a highly nominated piece of shit. 

At least some of the most egregious stuff didn't happen. American Sniper made it to Best Picture, but failed to garner Clint a Best Director nom. Unbroken didn't make a dent. Into The Woods didn't make Best Picture. 

And a lot of good nominations did happen. JK Simmons is up there, and the producer of The Purge is now Best Picture nominated for Whiplash. Laura Dern got a surprise nomination! Grand Budapest Hotel has a wonderful nine nominations, including Wes Anderson's first ever Best Director nod (believe it or not). 

But man, I look at this list and all I see if Morten Tyldum. Jesus Christ. 

Best Picture
“American Sniper”
“The Grand Budapest Hotel”
“The Imitation Game”
“The Theory of Everything”

Actor in a Leading Role
Steve Carell, “Foxcatcher”
Bradley Cooper, “American Sniper”
Benedict Cumberbatch, “The Imitation Game”
Michael Keaton, “Birdman”
Eddie Redmayne, “The Theory of Everything”

Actress in a Leading Role
Marion Cotillard, “Two Days One Night”
Felicity Jones, “The Theory of Everything”
Julianne Moore, “Still Alice”
Rosamund Pike, “Gone Girl”
Reese Witherspoon, “Wild”

Actor in a Supporting Role
Robert Duvall, “The Judge”
Ethan Hawke, “Boyhood”
Edward Norton, “Birdman”
Mark Ruffalo, “Foxcatcher”
J.K. Simmons, “Whiplash”

Actress in a Supporting Role
Patricia Arquette, “Boyhood”
Laura Dern, “Wild”
Emma Stone, “Birdman”
Keira Knightley, “The Imitation Game”
Meryl Streep, “Into the Woods”

Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu, “Birdman”
Richard Linklater, “Boyhood”
Bennett Miller, “Foxcatcher”
Wes Anderson, “The Grand Budapest Hotel”
Morten Tyldum, “The Imitation Game”

Foreign Language Film
“Wild Tales”

Writing – Adapted Screenplay
Graham Moore, “The Imitation Game”
Damien Chazelle, “Whiplash”
Anthony McCarten, “The Theory of Everything”
Jason Hall, “American Sniper”
Paul Thomas Anderson, “Inherent Vice”

Writing – Original Screenplay
Richard Linklater, “Boyhood”
Alejandro González Iñárritu, Nicolás Giacobone, Alexander Dinelaris and Armando Bo, “Birdman”
Wes Anderson and Hugo Guinness, “The Grand Budapest Hotel”
Dan Gilroy, “Nightcrawler”
E. Max Frye and Dan Futterman, “Foxcatcher”

Emmanuel Lubezki, “Birdman”
Roger Deakins, “Unbroken”
Robert D. Yeoman, “The Grand Budapest Hotel”
Dick Pope, “Mr. Turner”
Lukasz Zal and Ryszard Lynzewski, “Ida”

Music – Original Score
Hans Zimmer, “Interstellar”
Alexandre Desplat, “The Imitation Game”
Johann Johannsson, “The Theory of Everything”
Alexandre Desplat, “The Grand Budapest Hotel”
Gary Yershon, “Mr Turner”

Makeup and Hairstyling
“The Grand Budapest Hotel”
“Guardians of the Galaxy”

Costume Design
Colleen Atwood, “Into the Woods”
Anna B. Sheppard, “Maleficent”
Milena Canonero, “The Grand Budapest Hotel”
Jacqueline Durran, “Mr. Turner”
Mark Bridges, “Inherent Vice”

Music – Original Song
“Glory” by Common and John Legend, “Selma”
“Lost Stars” by Gregg Alexander, Danielle Brisebois, Nick Lashley and Nick Southwood, “Begin Again”
“Everything Is Awesome” by Shawn Patterson, “The LEGO Movie”
“I’m Not Gonna Miss You,” by Glen Campbell, “Glenn Campbell: I’ll Be Me”
“Grateful,” “Beyond the lights”

Visual Effects
“Dawn of the Planet of the Apes”
“Guardians of the Galaxy”
“Captain America: Winter Soldier”
“X-Men: Days of Future Past”Documentary Short Subject

“Crisis Hotline: Veterans Press 1”
“Our Curse”
“White Earth”
“The Reaper”

Documentary Feature
“Last Days in Vietnam”
“The Salt of the Earth”
“Finding Vivian Maier”

Film Editing
Sandra Adair, “Boyhood”
Tom Cross, “Whiplash”
William Goldenberg, “The Imitation Game”
Joel Cox and Gary Roach, “American Sniper”
Barney Pilling, “The Grand Budapest Hotel”

Sound Editing
“The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies”
“American Sniper”

Sound Mixing
Mark Weingarten, “Interstellar”
Thomas Curley, ”Whiplash”
“American Sniper”

Production Design
“Into the Woods”
“The Grand Budapest Hotel”
“The Imitation Game”
“Mr. Turner”

Short Film – Live Action
“Boogaloo and Graham”
“The Phone Call”

Short Film – Animated
“The Bigger Picture”
“A Single Life”
“The Dam Keeper”
“Me and My Moulton”

Animated Feature Film
“Big Hero 6”
“How to Train Your Dragon 2”
“The Boxtrolls”
“The Tale of the Princess Kaguya”
“Song of the Sea”