A New Trailer For CAROL, Supposedly The Greatest Movie Ever Made

“Let’s just be quiet and let the critics do the talking.”

Maybe you don’t know this yet, but Todd Haynes’ Carol is apparently the greatest movie ever made. That’s the opinion of my Twitter feed anyway. This is the very definition of a non-Evan movie, so I doubt I’ll ever know. Poor Devin Faraci just isn’t in-step with his peers on this one.

If you have heard all this praise but don’t actually know what Carol’s about, here is a trailer to confuse you further. It’s all pretty pictures of pretty people, crying to the sound of pretty music. Instead of dialog, the trailer is punctuated with critical accolades:

So there you have it. Carol is a movie you should see not because it sounds interesting (though it does look beautiful) but because you might feel like a dumb-dumb if you don’t, which means you’ll have to sit at the kid's table with me and JCVD. Could be worse! We have burgers! And you can usually nab Jean’s since he’s always dieting.