I am but a simple caveman. Your world frightens and confuses me. Is my home really being overrun with unspeakably cute monsters who I am meant to enslave and force into battle? Are the so-called "Pokemasters" wandering my city's fair streets actually hunters, or are they nothing more than mindless zombies whose brains have turned to mush via the transportive power of AR technology? What is AR technology? What is a "Detective Pikachu"?
I confess to you that I do not know.
But I do know that all of these elements have conspired to create the following situation, which I understand is of great interest to many people, particularly people of the younger generation:
On the heels of Pokemon Go fever, Legendary has closed a deal for the film rights for the iconic Japanese property.
Legendary and The Pokemon Co. on Wednesday announced that they will launch the first Pokemon live-action film franchise based on Detective Pikachu, a new character in the Pokemon universe.
I do not know what to do with this information, Your Honor, but I know that this information belongs in front of the jury.
Only they can determine whether or not this is "good news" or "bad news". I am, again, nothing more than a simple caveman, bumbling my way through this frightening world in search of understanding.
Detective Pikachu (or whatever the live-action Pokemon movie ends up being called) will begin shooting in 2017. We have no further information at this time.
The prosecution rests.