SDCC: Kurt Russell Has A Penis In GUARDIANS 2, Where He Plays Ego
Marvel tore the roof off Hall H with their presentation today, reaching a true fever pitch that culminated in a ton of Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 reveals, including the identity of Star Lord’s dad. He’s Ego the Living Planet.
Yes, he’s a planet.
This is a theory I have had for some time, and all the details I had theorized have come to be true! See, in this movie Ego the Living Planet created an avatar of himself, a biological being with which he could explore the universe (hey, sort of like a guy named God and his son named Jesus). At some point he met Star Lord’s mom, did the nasty and… here we are.
But that makes you ask: Ego made himself a penis? Drax asked Ego the exact same question in a clip Marvel showed.
“Yes, Drax, I have a penis,” said Kurt Russell as Star Lord.
Other highlights of the Guardians reveal:
We saw an extended jailbreak sequence where Rocket, Yondu and Baby Groot escape the Ravagers. Yondu has a new fin that controls his arrows, and he sends Baby Groot - who the Ravagers deem too cute to kill (they’re right) - on a mission to get it. It takes Groot a lot of tries (he comes back with a thumb and a desk among other things), but once Yondu is equipped he handily slices through the Ravager hordes. There’s one shot of Yondu, Rocket and Groot walking in slow mo on a catwalk while Ravager corpses rain around them and the soundtrack blares Come A Little Bit Closer by Jay & The Americans (one of two Awesome Mix Vol 2 songs revealed at the panel).
Baby Groot, by the way, is amazing. In the footage we saw he was a little tiny guy wearing a Ravagers outfit, and it looked great on him. He's gonna be an even bigger breakout than he was in the first film.
There was also a trailer, and it reveals that the Guardians are working together a heroes. When it starts they’re getting ready to fight a tentacle beast from another dimension, working at the behest of the gold-skinned Sovereign race (hey, what other cosmic Marvel character is gold skinned?). The second song was revealed here: Break the Chain by Fleetwood Mac, which plays over the rest of the footage.
Also in the footage: Sylvester Stallone! Confirmed! He was wearing what looked like a Nova Corps uniform. Hard to be sure - it was quick.
The jokes in the footage was great - at one point Rocket complains about Star Lord calling him a raccoon, so Star Lord calls him a trash panda (“Is that worse?” asks Drax. “It is SO MUCH WORSE!” Star Lord giggles). The action looks big and fun, and this was just what they had to show - the movie finished shooting a few days ago.
So your big news from San Diego this year: Kurt Russell has a penis.