John Malkovich Stars In The First Great Superbowl Ad Of 2017

"You will find me in your yard..."

The Superbowl is almost upon us, and you know what that means: we're about to be inundated with blockbuster movie trailers and blindsided by high-concept ad campaigns with production budgets so needlessly wasteful that Howard Hughes himself would tell these folks to pump the brakes.

The onslaught of movie trailers will begin later this week. For now, all we've got is this commercial, for Squarespace, which features an increasingly-irate John Malkovich dealing with some unbelievable asshole who dared to register before he could. It's great.

Check it out:

Look, we're movie people. By and large, we could give two shits about football. But as long as companies keep shelling out absurd amounts of money to produce commercials like this (and, god willing, a Dark Tower trailer; hint, hint, Sony), Superbowl season won't feel like a complete waste of time.

Speaking of which: we'll be highlighting more of these ads in the days ahead, but promise to only bring you the most entertaining selections. Plus movie trailers. And maybe a lengthy editorial from Phil about the Puppy Bowl, if that's a thing they're still doing. 

Stay tuned, folks, and pray for the safety of not-John Malkovich.