Danny DeVito Joins JUMANJI Sequel, Thus Making It The Greatest Movie Of 2019

And don’t even act like I’m wrong.

I liked Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle. It was slight and not especially exciting, but it also had more good writing and charm than I was expecting from the gigantic film. Now we’re hearing about a sequel with both the cast and director returning, aided by the addition of the always welcome Awkwafina. Somehow, this movie is meant to come out in less than a year. Okay, that all sounds good.

But now there’s news that changes everything. According to Variety, none other than the greatest actor of all time, Danny DeVito, has joined the cast. So anyone nostalgic about how the dude contrasted with Schwarzenegger can now enjoy how he contrasts with The Rock. It’s all going full circle.

Details are mum on who exactly DeVito will be playing, which seems a tad bit overprotective to me, but I can be patient. My assumption is some super hot kid gets him as a game avatar and becomes overjoyed by their new enhanced beauty and ability to gargle beer like a volcano. I suppose we’ll find out once trailers start hitting.