Earlier today, I was minding my own business on Twitter when I stumbled across the following tweet from our ol' pal Phil Nobile Jr., now the editor-in-chief of Fangoria Magazine:
Good morning. https://t.co/39EvLNsUya pic.twitter.com/Ew3I8zVblD
— Phil Nobile Jr. (@PhilNobileJr) March 5, 2019
Could it be? Had someone finally done it?
Yup. Someone finally did it.
For years now, I've been telling anyone who'd listen that what someone really oughtta do is turn The Shining's iconic "Blowjob Dog" into a Halloween costume. Virtually every person I shared this idea with told me I was crazy, that surely there'd be no market for such a thing. "Who would wanna dress up like the Blowjob Dog from The Shining?", these small-minded buffoons would say, sometimes adding, "This idea is both foolish and inappropriate."
Well, thank God for the visionaries at Trick or Treat Studios, who are now selling an officially-licensed "Roger The Dog Man" mask via their website. Trick or Treat Studios has all manner of awesome costumes (seriously, just go poke around their site and you'll find all kinds of cool shit), and now they have established themselves as the only company in the world with the vision, the courage and the know-how to immortalize The Shining's greatest side character in high-quality rubber and fur. If you think I'm not buying one of these immediately, you are out of your goddamn mind.
Anyway, it's a slow news day, and on the off chance that, like me, you have always wished to own this very particular, very upsetting mask, I figured this'd be worth sharing with you, the gentle Birth.Movies.Death. readers of the world. Pre-orders are open now and should be delivered just in time for Halloween. You know what to do.