Chris Rock’s SAW Movie Will Now Arrive Five Whole Months Early

You're welcome, America.

Great news, everyone-ish: That wild-ass Chris Rock Saw movie will now hit theaters five months earlier than expected. If this is your first time hearing about Chris Rock's Saw movie, then this news is probably affecting you in a completely different way. Per Variety, the untitled Saw reboot will arrive on May 15, 2020, five months ahead of its original October 23 date – which totally has absolutely nothing to do whatsoever with Universal announcing plans to release David Gordon Green's Halloween Kills on October 16, 2020. The real (or "real - wink wink") reason is that Lionsgate execs have allegedly seen footage of Rock's Saw reboot, directed by Darren Lynn Bousman (who previously directed the second, third and fourth movies in the series), and are so pumped about it that they just can't wait to put it in front of your eyeballs. 

For those who had no idea this was a thing: Rock's Saw reboot, which he's also producing, is based on his own pitch and stars the comedian/actor as a detective investigating a series of crimes (that are probably very Saw-like). Samuel L. Jackson will play his dad, Max Minghella plays Rock's partner, and Marisol Nichols (aka Veronica Lodge's mom on Riverdale) plays a police captain. We have no idea if Tobin Bell is returning for the reboot, but the very nature of the thing suggests probably not. Beyond that, little is known about the Saw reboot, but according to a dream I had two nights ago it is a very meta horror film like Wes Craven's New Nightmare, but with Jigsaw and Chris Rock and lots of eye-gouging with rusty metal instruments.